Topic: Favorite Quotes

[xofelf]

Does anyone have any quotes that they love, but don't use in their signature? I know I do! For example: A bumper sticker: Bad cop. No doughnut. And then there's the ever so lovely, Duct tape is like the Force. It has a Dark side and a Light side. And it holds the Universe together. T-shirt.

Add your favorites here please!

[Caenus]

Heh, here's another one regarding cops:

"When a police officer says to you, 'gee, son, your eyes look bloodshot.  Have you been drinking?' It's best not to reply with 'gee, officer, your eyes look glazed.  Have you been eating donuts?'"

A few more.

One of the best movie quotes ever comes from Independence Day:
"It's not me!  They're overriding the system!  Oh . . . shit . . . um . . . HIDE."

[PieceMaker]

This bumpersticker I would say fits me pretty well: "I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every minute of it."

"You are what you eat, don't be a vegetable."

And Cae, although that quote from Independence Day is pretty funny, I think these three are better (it should be obvious what they're from):

Monk: And the Lord spoke, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out! Once the number three, being the third number be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thou foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."

and

King Arthur: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
The Black Knight: 'Tis but a scratch.
King Arthur: A scratch?! Your arm's off.
The Black Knight: No it isn't.
King Arthur: Then what's that then.
The Black Knight: I've had worse.

and

The Black Knight: Right, I'll do you for that.
King Arthur: You'll what?
The Black Knight: Come here.
King Arthur: What are you gonna do, bleed on me?
The Black Knight: I'm invincible!
King Arthur: You're a loony.

and then the website www.despair.com has a lot of funny demotivators.

[contingencyplan]

Despair.com is HILARIOUS!

Personal faves from there: Burnout, Regret, Persistence, Beauty (for the "perfect for")...

And my absolute favorite: PESSIMISM!

[PieceMaker]

Yea, I think the Beauty one is one of my all time favorites. That and "Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people."

[xofelf]

Thanks for responding i love the quotes! Here's mine of the day.....it's from a website called www.potterpuppetpals.com "follow the butterflies! whee!" "Ronnicus explodicus!"

[xofelf]

Okay since no one is replying any more i shall add some of my personal favorites....and they were all said by Angelena(if you don't know who she is I must smite you and then tell you to ask Chris, Dave, Ericka, Mikey, Lauren....etc)
" Is a liquid a solid?"
"lena you're a nut bar" "Don't eat me....I'm homeless(She said harmless but can't speak very well with food in her mouth)"
i can't think of more so, i'm gonna ask Morgul to add some of her best....oh yeah....you may thank Morgul for my loverly avatar!

[Morgul]

"Chris, I don't want you to go to college! I want you to stay here!"
"Lena, I can't... I need to learn things so I can get a job!"
"Stay here, and play with me! I'll teach you all my homework, and I'll even pay you! With Quarters!"

Yeah, my little sister Angelena is funny.

--Chris

[Neo]

Well, I didn't have it in my signarute untill recently:

"If at first you don't succeed failure may be your style."

----

ubido bedubi: I am ubido bedubi, I have the sillyest name in the univerce.
Loke Groundrunner: What's your middle name?
ubido bedubi: Scooby-dooby
Loke Groundrunner: ubido Scooby-dooby bedubi?
ubido bedubi: One and the same.

----

Princess Bunhead: You are bad, and we are good. Your badness with be the end of you, and our goodness will be our triumph. Good is good. Bad is bad. Good, good, bad, good, bad, good, bad, good, bad... good...

----

"Why do we all speak with british accents when we are from outerspace and there is no britan?" *pop*

----

"What we have here is the most powerful destructive wepon this univerce has ever seen... Fortunatly they included a button, right here, that blowes the intire thing up!"
"How will we find this button, sir?!"
"Well that's the best part! They made this long coridor that leads right to it! You just zip in, follow a strate line, and fire!"
"Why would they do that?"
"I don't know, but isn't it great?"

----

"I will use my feelings and the power of 'the thumb'!"
"No, Loke, use the insturment pannel."
"What?"
"Use the insturment pannel, advanced weapons designed for hitting tiny targets."

----

"Cosmo has boobies"

----

"Bunnies aren't meant for that!"

[xofelf]

You guys ought to read some of the following websites.......great for a laff....
www.dumblaws.com
www.dumbbumpers.com
and another Lena quote...you need to know the story first though. we were playing a gamme called the old woman game(if you want the details you may ask me) and we try to make the other laugh.....well she started shaking like she was having convulsions and yelled out, "Constipation!"she really meant convusions..if i have spelled something wrong you may correct it

[Neo]

laugh

[xofelf]

i thought so.....*blows raspberry at reynard*

[ryguy_1617]

and another Lena quote...you need to know the story first though. we were playing a gamme called the old woman game(if you want the details you may ask me) and we try to make the other laugh.....well she started shaking like she was having convulsions and yelled out, "Constipation!"she really meant convusions..if i have spelled something wrong you may correct it[/glow]

heh...reminds me of something my brother did...when he was at school one time, he was supposed to explain what a condo is, and he goes: "Isn't that like a condom?"

[Neo]

See New sig quote:

Peace is a lie, There is only Passion
Through Passion I gain Strength
Through Strength I gain Power
Through Power I gain Victory
Through Victory my chains are broken

[PieceMaker]

This isn't word for word, but it's close enough:

Man: Excuse me miss, my driver got a little lost. You see I'm supposed to be at the hospital right now giving a lecture. Could you give me directions?
Woman: Sure. You drive down the street about two blocks and take a right.
Man: Your accent, Pennsylvanian?
Woman: No, Austrian.
Man: Austrian huh. Well, goo'day mate.

I think it went something like that. Haven't heard it in a while.

[Xof]

I just thought every line from the 40 year old virgin was hilarious....so here is some of them.

Cal: [to Andy about telling Trish he's a virgin] Yeah, you should definitely tell her, because I saw this movie called "Liar Liar" and the message was, "*Don't* lie."
[pause]
Cal: And that was a smart movie.


Cal: [about Andy wanting to tell Trish he's a virgin] Here, tell me, this is how it's gonna go.
Andy Stitzer: I'm a virgin.
Cal: Cool! I like that, because I know you don't have... chlamydia. I *know* that. I mean that shit is everywhere...

[contingencyplan]

I saw about the last half of that movie (missed the first part). Surprisingly funny.

[Caenus]

I thought it was funny.  Wasn't nearly as crude as I thought it may be.

[xofelf]

here's a new qoute....this is one of my own from when i was about 2....i woke up from my nap walked into my mom's room and announced proudly "i have fourteen buts!"
i don't remember this but i found the journal my mom kept for me......more later

[Morgul]

She really does too... :P