Author Topic: Forum Rules and Decorum [Newbies, Read First!]  (Read 2096 times)

Offline Morgul

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Forum Rules and Decorum [Newbies, Read First!]
« on: September 04, 2006, 12:47:17 am »
Forum Rules and Decorum
Updated September 4th, 2006


Preamble:

Well, we've gone almost two years without a set of standing rules, but I figured that in light of some recent personal conflicts I've heard about (on a different set of forums, but by people who are also users here) I figure it's time to outline my iron fisted rules. Keep in mind, these are flexable in the sense that I treat ever user and situation as unique, and individual. They are inflexable in the sense that I do NOT make exceptions for friends, 'emotional trauma' (I've yet to see someone who can top me in that department), or 'jokes'. You don't have to offend anyone on the forums; all that is necessary is for me to be offended or think it's out of line for you to get in trouble.

Behavior:

I expect everyone on the forums to act civilly. Personal issues do not belong on these forums. Bigotry, Intollerance (of any kind) and tempers will not be tolerated. Should a personal issue arrise, the correct manner of dealing with it is with pm's, e-mails, im's, etc off the forums. Do not involve me, or anyone else, if it can be avoided. If you would like me to interceed on your behalf, simply pm me, explain the situation, explain what you and the other person have done to attempt to resolve it, and then I will either accept or decline. Do not ask for my help a second time.

Should a personal issue appear on the forums, this is how it will be handled.

1) I will pm which ever party seems to be out of line, and explain why they are out of line.
2) Should posts be offensive, or deragotry, they will be deleted, and/or the post will be locked, and possible read access will be removed for everyone but admins. The thread may be split, depending on topic, and my mood.
3) If users continue to let their personal problems appear on the forums, I will ban both parties for 3 days.
4) If that has not remove the issue, I will perma ban both users, and delete their accounts.

Once things get to #4, the only way to ever be a member of these forums again is for you to write an appology to myself, the forum members, and to the other party, explain what you did wrong, why you felt you could ignore my warnings, and why it won't happen again in the future. This must be a minimum of 150 words. I will post it publically, and I will consult some, or all of the admins before allowing you back in. This is on a per user basis. Just because one party did it doesn't mean I will unban both. Appologies must also be unique, and can't be copy/pasted.

Post Quality:

There are a good number of people on this forum who cannot spell. Myself included. However, if I[/i] can catch your spelling mistakes, then there is a problem. Generally so long as it's not too far off, I'm fine, but do not post any posts that look like this:

Quote from: R3t4Rdz0rZN00b73t
Omg, leik teh ohter day wen i was wolkingb past teh maryott hotil, i saw a sine for a gam3rz0rz con! ti w4s leik soooooooooooooopp tptalie awsum. i bet thair are leik CS grils n' shti. if tere R any grils tere i w4nt to doo thum. brb, n33de mt. dew.

Posts like the above will earn you my scorn, and I will make fun of you for it (in a single post). Everyone on the forums will also be allowed one post making fun of your post (within reason). After 24 hours, the thread will be locked, pm sent to you, and I will also send you a few sites about why net speak, and spelling are good. I might even let Contingencyplan explain in painful detail why good grammar is appreciated.

Post content is also important. Should you post about objectional material, I will deal with you in whatever way I feel is most appropriate. (How I deal with you is up to me. This is a carte blanche for me, so be wary. If you are unsure, pm me, or another admin, and ask. If an admin says it's ok, and I feel it's not, I'll be polite to you, and chew out the admin.

 Final Comments:

If you don't feel this policy is fair, please, leave. I refuse to let any bullshit ruin these forums for the people who visit them. I will be fair, and if you don't feel i'm being fair, tell me. I'm a rational human being. This may sound like I'm being a hard ass, or am angry, I'm not. Honestly, I want these rules to sound threatening, and scary. If they don't then there's a chance they will get broken, and that's what I want to avoid. Seriously, all of these rules have been in plave for the last two years, they just haven't been listed. If you've not had a problem up till now, you will not have a problem in the future. So far, none of these rules have had to be used, and I want to keep it that way.

Oh, a final comment. All admins have the right to follow these policies the same as if they were me. I do, however, retain the right to overturn any decision made by any admin. Also, admins must consult me before taking any action such as temp or perma bans, or even post deletions. Nothing permanant can be done without my authorization.

--Morgul
« Last Edit: September 04, 2006, 12:54:18 am by morgul »
"Just because my math may tell lies doesn't mean that I don't understand the quantum mechanics of it all." --Caenus

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Offline Caenus

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Re: Forum Rules and Decorum [Newbies, Read First!]
« Reply #1 on: January 16, 2010, 12:02:55 am »
As an addendum to this list of rules, I'd like to walk you through a few things from that wonderful repository of knowledge, Cracked.com.




You are not some evil genius, criminal mastermind, or master debater.  That honor belongs to me.  Although, I'll let morgul have the title of Mas. Debater.  :blink:

Morgul: Yeeeah, and that was enough to make me poke your post with my own thoughts. See what wrath you hath wrought?


In all seriousness, if you try to back out of some horrible situation by claiming it to be all a part of an overly convoluted plot, I'll unleash my overly simplistic solution: banhammer.  Grow up, be a man (or woman, as the case may be) and behave with a modicum of dignity.




Attempting to act like some sort of pseudo-intellectual in here and talking down to us will not go over well.  There are several people on this forum who are ACTUAL intellectuals, and acting like one of us is like riding the elevator with one other person and trying to convince them that they're the one that farted.

Not gonna happen.

Morgul: Just to be clear. Most of us come here to unwind. We screw around, shit up our own corner of the internet, and let our brains shut off. Not always, but a decent amount of the time. Should you try to compete with us, you will be shocked and amazed to find that, guess what? Windshipper's actually a fucking genius who knows a helluva lot more about this subject then you do. Oh, and he's a mod, so proving you're smarter then him's just not going to work out for you either way.



Edit all you want.  Try and misdirect.  Smoke and mirrors are all a part of the Vegas experience!  Oh, wait, we aren't in Vegas?  Oh, damn . . . well, in that case leave the prestidigitation to the professionals and own up to something you've said.  You're not infallible :catholic: and you just sound like a pretentious prick when you try to maintain the upper hand by claiming to be so.

If we have to call you on this one, the consequence will fit the crime (excommunication for the would-be pope).

Morgul: Well said, Caenus. And, frankly, half of us are Mafia players. We know our shit, dawg. We eat Strawmen, and shit wifom.




In order to participate in a debate, you must address the points made by your opponent.  Refusal to do so is simply succumbing to the delusion that because you're a super-genius who CAN'T BE WRONG (again with the infallibility, your holiness?).  Guess what?  If you can't talk someone down in a straightforward debate, then odds are that YOU'RE WRONG AND YOUR CASE SUCKS.  

Get over it and learn to argue like someone with an IQ higher than 12.  

If you commit this cardinal sin, I'm gonna sic Windshipper on you.  You'll beg for death before the end.

Morgul: No, seriously. That's fucked up, Caenus. You're one cruel motherfucker. Then again... we all are, aren't we?




We can track your IP.  It's so obvious to the admins that you're the same person it's not even funny.  This sort of sick self-dependence is looked on here as a sign that you are incurably ill and must be put down in an inhumane fashion.  

Something like posting all of your personal shit to 4Chan.  And then banning the hell out of you.  Both of you.  And your mom.

Actually, your mom can stay.

Morgul: :quagmire:




Guess what - using the phrase "I'm leaving" means we're gonna lock the door behind you, pawn your shit, and burn the stuff we couldn't sell.  

If you resort to the above offense to workaround this one, then you're just setting yourself up to get kicked in the twat, now aren't you?

Seriously, idle threats (especially of - oh, heaven forbid! - going away and never bothering us again) don't phase us.  If you're gonna get out, you better get your shit, leave your key on the dresser and burn my goddamn phone number, because I don't wanna see your face again.

Morgul: This is a pet peeve of mine. I am not above whois-ing your ip, finding what town you live in and leaving an anonymous tip about the 20 gigs of kiddy porn I got whitelynx to download to your computer. Do this, and I will personally ruin you.




This one had better be self-explanatory.  Explosive topics approached in any manner other than respectful and careful as hell are guaranteed to backfire and result in the banning of the originator of the drama.  

Also, advocation of furries and/or Yif will get you banned regardless of how respectful you are, you sick bastard.  There's respect for sexual orientation, and then there's just turning a blind eye to some twisted, unnatural shit.  

Morgul: I'm not as :hammer: on the furry stuff as Caenus. There's some good, non Yif comics out there, and I acknowledge it's a culture. There's good furries, and... then there's... those furries. In either regard...  Yif == :hammer: After all, most of us are :texan:.




The First Amendment states that the GOVERNMENT can make no law "abridging the freedom of speech".  

Guess what?  Private institutions can make up whatever rules they damn well please.  This forum is an extension of a privately owned company, and as such can establish whatever rules of decorum we wish.

Threaten legal action, and I'll sic Windshipper's lawyer on you.  And death will come only after you've filled out the requisite forms in triplicate.

Morgul: ...and buried in peat-moss for 3 years, uncovered, recycled as matchsticks...



AKA Reynard syndrome.  Seriously though, did your parents never slap the shit out of you for throwing out an insincere apology?  No?  Dammit all, what has society come to?  

If you apologize, you'd better damn well mean it, otherwise I'm gonna assume you're just attempting to weave some elaborate maneuver and pull an offense #1.  And, no, my letter to you explaining your ban will not contain an apology of any kind, you will have earned it, jackoff.  

Morgul: :rofl: Yes, if you do this you're not only an idiot, but you're :downs: enough to become the butt end of a running joke. Where do you think Reynard Syndrome came from, hmm? The last jackass to make this mistake.




You are not an elite delta force ninja.  I am.  Odds are, any credential you make up to bolster your self esteem and give you that last centimeter of "oh-I'm-so-awesome" raging boner can and will likely be trumped on these forums.  We boast mathematicians, biologists, physicists, and (as stated earlier) some REAL intellectuals.  Wanna convince me you're an English scholar?  Use proper grammar.  Think I need to accept your claim that you're an M.D.?  Don't feed me lines from ER.  Trust me, it won't work.  

Dr. Loves-himself-too-much will be paged for an urgent meeting with the hospital chief of staff, and frankly, there's just no room in the budget for a sniveling little fuck, so we're gonna have to let you go.

Right after I sic Windshipper on you.

Morgul: There's only one guy on these forums with a limp and pain medication. And he thinks you're an idiot.




Edgy hasn't been edgy since I was a kid.  Case in point, emo culture.  This is not livejournal.  It is not your little playground for you and all your eyeliner sporting friends to come and sulk.  Having absolutely no decency and then trying to write it off as being "edgy" is like faking a credential - you aren't edgy.  You're just a douche.

And you will be banned.  Now go cut yourself.

Morgul: Ahem. Give me all you cash and then go cut your self. Or, I'm sure we could come up with something more enjoyable. For us... not you. And no, you get no say.
« Last Edit: January 16, 2010, 01:11:22 am by Morgul »
Merciful Father, I have squandered my days with plans of many things. This was not among them. But at this moment, I beg only to live the next few minutes well. For all we ought to have thought, and have not thought; all we ought to have said, and have not said; all we ought to have done, and have not done; I pray thee God for forgiveness.