Author Topic: Things you just can't say....  (Read 85802 times)

Offline xofelf

  • Grand Admiral
  • **********
  • Posts: 1028
  • Karma: +3/-2
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #20 on: June 04, 2007, 09:29:22 am »
Nice!
~Erica~

"if at first you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you"

Offline PieceMaker

  • GN:EF Subcommander
  • Captain
  • ******
  • Posts: 299
  • Karma: +2/-2049
  • I'm behind you. No really, look... Haha...shmuck!
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #21 on: March 07, 2008, 04:04:17 pm »
Eh, I know this thread is old, but there's one I accidentally said that sounded so terribly perverted. Keep in mind that I didn't mean to say sack, but it's the only thing I could think of because sacks hold stuff.

"How much does your ball sack hold?"

That was me commenting on a paintball hopper. :wifom:

The true hacker almost always accuses the non-hacker of doing the hacking. - PieceMaker

Offline xofelf

  • Grand Admiral
  • **********
  • Posts: 1028
  • Karma: +3/-2
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #22 on: March 07, 2008, 04:06:01 pm »
nice! :rara:
~Erica~

"if at first you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you"

Offline leftie

  • Art Slave
  • Commodore
  • *****
  • Posts: 355
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #23 on: March 07, 2008, 04:26:41 pm »
My friend Will did a comic commission which featured a busty woman who is quite nude in various parts of it. But it was also really cute, and quirky, 'specially that woman character.
So, when I finished reading the second volume of it, I said to Will, "She's so cute; I love it!" And he said, "Yeah, cute. The whole thing's like 'cute porn.'" We all have a good laugh, when I made things worse.
I said, "Cute porn, yeah! Like kiddie porn!"
Awkward silence...
"WAIT, NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!"
I was... embarrassed, and continued to defend myself when friend Brandon said, "She just meant porn for kids."
Grateful, I said, "Yeah! Like... Disney Porn!!!"

WHY do I always make things worse?  :crazy:

Offline xofelf

  • Grand Admiral
  • **********
  • Posts: 1028
  • Karma: +3/-2
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #24 on: March 07, 2008, 04:28:03 pm »
ah...gotta love you ginny!
~Erica~

"if at first you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you"

Offline PieceMaker

  • GN:EF Subcommander
  • Captain
  • ******
  • Posts: 299
  • Karma: +2/-2049
  • I'm behind you. No really, look... Haha...shmuck!
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #25 on: March 07, 2008, 04:36:13 pm »
Hahahahahahahaha. That's awesome Emerwyn. :toot:
The true hacker almost always accuses the non-hacker of doing the hacking. - PieceMaker

Offline contingencyplan

  • Villain
  • Moderator
  • Admiral
  • *****
  • Posts: 977
  • Karma: +1/-0
  • Must I sin once, and repent forever?
    • View Profile
    • My Blog
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #26 on: March 08, 2008, 01:08:44 am »
My friend Will did a comic commission which featured a busty woman who is quite nude in various parts of it. But it was also really cute, and quirky, 'specially that woman character.
So, when I finished reading the second volume of it, I said to Will, "She's so cute; I love it!" And he said, "Yeah, cute. The whole thing's like 'cute porn.'" We all have a good laugh, when I made things worse.
I said, "Cute porn, yeah! Like kiddie porn!"
Awkward silence...
"WAIT, NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!"
I was... embarrassed, and continued to defend myself when friend Brandon said, "She just meant porn for kids."
Grateful, I said, "Yeah! Like... Disney Porn!!!"

WHY do I always make things worse?  :crazy:

Wow, that's fantastic.

The best Disney porn, without question, is the ones with Jasmine from Aladdin.

Especially with her tiger. :toot:
We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true. 
    ~Robert Wilensky

It is not bigotry to be certain we are right; but it is bigotry to be unable to imagine how we might possibly have gone wrong.
    ~GK Chesterton

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction.
    ~Blaise Pascal

Offline Caenus

  • Married Man
  • Moderator
  • Grand Admiral
  • *****
  • Posts: 2351
  • Karma: +5000/-1
  • That, I cannot do.
    • View Profile
    • Art Blog
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #27 on: March 08, 2008, 11:06:02 am »
I think you just told us more about yourself than we EVER wanted to know, Cplan.   :scumyell:
Merciful Father, I have squandered my days with plans of many things. This was not among them. But at this moment, I beg only to live the next few minutes well. For all we ought to have thought, and have not thought; all we ought to have said, and have not said; all we ought to have done, and have not done; I pray thee God for forgiveness.

Offline xofelf

  • Grand Admiral
  • **********
  • Posts: 1028
  • Karma: +3/-2
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #28 on: March 08, 2008, 03:42:11 pm »
i agree!
~Erica~

"if at first you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you"

Offline Morgul

  • GNE Founder
  • Moderator
  • Grand Admiral
  • *****
  • Posts: 2086
  • Karma: +21/-4
  • Godlike Fuzzy Dice
    • View Profile
    • G33X Nexus Entertainment
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #29 on: March 08, 2008, 06:10:22 pm »
 :toot:
"Just because my math may tell lies doesn't mean that I don't understand the quantum mechanics of it all." --Caenus

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Vin Diesel and forgot to pay him back.

"In the beginning there was nothing. And it exploded." --Terry Pratchett

Offline TrajanMax

  • Moderator
  • Rear Admiral
  • *****
  • Posts: 591
  • Karma: +4/-0
  • Voices are calling me, 'be my night!'
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #30 on: March 08, 2008, 09:33:24 pm »
This is more of a funny interruption that anything else....

For some reason my HS had a Ban on Rubber Bands, and anytime a teacher wanted on, they had to send a student to the office with a request.

I was sent to the office to do just that one day, and the following conversation took place:

 ;) = Me     :crazy: = Secretary   :rara: = Some rude individual who like to talk too much.

 ;) Mrs. So and So sent me down here.

 :crazy: Oh, what do you need?

 ;) I need a ......

 :rara:  :Insert Meaning less white noise here:

 ;) ......rubber....

 :crazy: You need a RUBBER, Oh MY GOD!!!!

So yeah, that probably wasn't that funny, but there ya go.

He has sounded forth the trumpet that shall never call retreat;
He is sifting out the hearts of men before His judgment-seat:
Oh, be swift, my soul, to answer Him! be jubilant, my feet!
   
    Our God is marching on.

        Glory, glory, hallelujah!
        Glory, glory, hallelujah!
        Glory, glory, hallelujah!
        While God is Marching on.

Offline PieceMaker

  • GN:EF Subcommander
  • Captain
  • ******
  • Posts: 299
  • Karma: +2/-2049
  • I'm behind you. No really, look... Haha...shmuck!
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #31 on: March 08, 2008, 11:44:31 pm »
Here's one I always seem to use unintentionally at LAN parties.

"If he has two NICs, then he can get net with one, and then we can jack off the other."
The true hacker almost always accuses the non-hacker of doing the hacking. - PieceMaker

Offline PieceMaker

  • GN:EF Subcommander
  • Captain
  • ******
  • Posts: 299
  • Karma: +2/-2049
  • I'm behind you. No really, look... Haha...shmuck!
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #32 on: March 10, 2008, 04:21:46 pm »
Alright, here's another one that just sounds wrong when I ask people about paintball stuff.

"Do you have all of your equipment?"
The true hacker almost always accuses the non-hacker of doing the hacking. - PieceMaker

MissTake1024

  • Guest
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #33 on: March 10, 2008, 04:49:48 pm »
Here's one that my friend Jamie is notorious for...
when playing Guitar Hero/Rock Band before starting a hard song he says
"I need my strap on for this one"

Offline Caenus

  • Married Man
  • Moderator
  • Grand Admiral
  • *****
  • Posts: 2351
  • Karma: +5000/-1
  • That, I cannot do.
    • View Profile
    • Art Blog
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #34 on: March 10, 2008, 06:34:04 pm »
This one was funny.

Morgul and I were talking the other day and I got frustrated.

Caenus:  "Fuck this!  Fuck Mickey Mouse with a 12" dick, break it off, and beat him with the rest of it."

Morgul:  *awkward silence* "See . . . I just can't be in the same room with someone who'd hit Mickey Mouse."
Merciful Father, I have squandered my days with plans of many things. This was not among them. But at this moment, I beg only to live the next few minutes well. For all we ought to have thought, and have not thought; all we ought to have said, and have not said; all we ought to have done, and have not done; I pray thee God for forgiveness.

Offline Morgul

  • GNE Founder
  • Moderator
  • Grand Admiral
  • *****
  • Posts: 2086
  • Karma: +21/-4
  • Godlike Fuzzy Dice
    • View Profile
    • G33X Nexus Entertainment
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #35 on: March 10, 2008, 06:39:03 pm »
This one was funny.

Morgul and I were talking the other day and I got frustrated.

Caenus:  "Fuck this!  Fuck Mickey Mouse with a 12" dick, break it off, and beat him with the rest of it."

Morgul:  *awkward silence* "See . . . I just can't be in the same room with someone who'd hit Mickey Mouse."

What can I say, I'm a Mouse Fan.
"Just because my math may tell lies doesn't mean that I don't understand the quantum mechanics of it all." --Caenus

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Vin Diesel and forgot to pay him back.

"In the beginning there was nothing. And it exploded." --Terry Pratchett

Offline PieceMaker

  • GN:EF Subcommander
  • Captain
  • ******
  • Posts: 299
  • Karma: +2/-2049
  • I'm behind you. No really, look... Haha...shmuck!
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #36 on: March 10, 2008, 08:06:40 pm »
Way to go Morgul!!! The Mouse is great.
The true hacker almost always accuses the non-hacker of doing the hacking. - PieceMaker

MissTake1024

  • Guest
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #37 on: March 10, 2008, 08:50:30 pm »
I'm actually deathly afraid of Mickey Mouse.  :'(

Offline Kmd4390

  • Grand Admiral
  • **********
  • Posts: 1188
  • Karma: +2/-1
    • View Profile
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #38 on: April 24, 2008, 11:01:02 am »
I have so many of these.
Instead of sitting here typing them all day, I will do them one at a time.
so for now................

On the bus one day:
I did not hear the first part of the conversation.
Only this.
6 or 7 year old girl- "Is it in?"
another girl about the same age- "Yep"
"You don't know bears like I do" -Alex Bobrow
"7s can't act like 10s"-Ted
"Why can't all girls be slutty and easy?"-Matt
"I dont cream that easy"-Ryan
"Woo I love being a butch"- Dakota
link to my mafia statistics
http://www.mafiascum.net/wiki/index.php?title=Kmd4390

MissTake1024

  • Guest
Re: Things you just can't say....
« Reply #39 on: April 24, 2008, 11:15:21 am »
 :doh: :doh:

Damn MTV!